Write a note....

Years ago I lost our first baby early in the pregnancy. It was a sad, even dark time for me. Looking back maybe even darker and sadder than I realized at the time. We went on to have a wonderful family. A house full of children and all that you'd expect to come with them. But the people who touch my life in that dark time did more for me than they will ever know. They reached out with kindness, sympathy and understanding, they reach out by writing me a note. I learned the enormous value of a small, handwritten caring message. Not grand philosophy or answers to the why and how. They were as simple as "I'm sorry." The notes came that week, some the next week, some the next month and even some continued for months. I would save them and read them when I needed a friend. I read them when I needed to cry and cleanse my mind. Reading some them over and over. I kept them like a treasure of strength from which I could draw. Never were they intrusive or inconvenient like a visit or call might be. When I read these notes I was not alone, someone knew I was hurting and they cared. I doubt the writers of these notes had any idea what an impact they had on the life of a young wife and would be mother. And 27 years later I continue to live out the lesson they taught me. I sent notes. Whenever someone is hurting I write a very simple often short "I'm so sorry, you are in my thoughts" sort of message and mail it to them. And I continue to send them, for months. On the one year anniversary of their loss I sent a note. I know the pain comes back and I want them to know I have not forgotten their grief and they are not alone. I want to give someone that treasure of strength that was given to me when I needed it most. For these little notes I will always be thankful.